Jesse's Full Name is: Jesse Mackey

Jesse's Really Full Name is: Jesse "Sneaky" Danger Mackey, Pea-Muffin, Private Eye, Ninja Extraordinaire

Jesse can be reached [via e-mail] should there be anything you need to say to him.

Jesse was born at the very end of January, in the great year of 1982.

Jesse is from Utica, New York, and is currently living in Columbus, Ohio.

Jesse has an Associate's Degree in Electrical Engineering Tech which he is not currently using.

Jesse has an aptitude for fixing PCs, and might take a look at yours if you ask nicely and/or offer him a bribe. Pizza and beer may or may not be an acceptable bribe, depending on the day and severity of your problems.

Jesse is laid back. He has decided that stress is not an option, and strives to live accordingly. He would appreciate if you did not attempt to infringe upon his lack of stress; that's just not cool, man.

Jesse believes everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt, and a second chance; we are, after all, only human. Third chances are subject to a lengthy application process.

Jesse is a fan of spontaneity and is not necessarily guaranteed to do what you expect. If engaged in conversation, he will likely make some sort of attempt to make you laugh; whether or not it works is another story altogether.

Jesse likes math and science. He thinks prime numbers are cool. He will make jokes involving Heisenberg and Schroedinger. He can do complex calculus (or could, last time he tried), but has trouble with simple mental math. No one is really sure why.

Jesse loves music. In particular, he likes industrial and electronic genres, but harbors a dull hatred for trance. Quality is key. Rock and metal are also favoured, but wussiness will not be tolerated. Jesse cannot be held accountable for any injury or property damage that may occur as a result of playing Bon Jovi in his presence. Jesse has a fascination with the art of the beat which has led to an appreciation of certain types of hip-hop and rap. Country music is, and will likely always be, anathema.

Lastly, if Jesse had the time, he would personally speak to each and every person that posts on the internet and explain the difference between the words "lose" and "loose." The sheer number of people who confuse these two words is enough to make one wonder if there was a batch of grade-school English books that had the chapter on L-words misprinted. For the record, use "lose" when you've misplaced something, or when you've failed to defeat the opposing team in a sports game. Use "loose" when describing that tooth that's about to fall out because you fight too much, or when trying to insult your promiscuous ex-girlfriend.

I started this site a long, long time ago, and I've been updating and adding to it ever since. It really doesn't have a purpose; I just enjoy doing it, and you might find some useful things here, if you look hard enough (but don't get your hopes up)... But it doesn't really matter much to me that there's not actually anything here. I just keep it up so I can play with HTML and web design.

I used to code everything in HTML, which was a tedious process, at best. After I learned that things could be done better, I tossed some CSS in the mix and "upgraded" the menus to JavaScript (I know, I know, but it's gone now). It made changing things a hell of a lot easier when you only had to edit one file, rather than 30. Most recently, I've switched over to PHP, and I'm still pretty impressed at how versatile it is.

I made a vague attempt at cross-browser support and try to keep things around here as compliant as I can.

[Metapad]: The site is coded using this, a free replacement for Windows Notepad.
[Paint Shop Pro 9]: I edit all the graphics and photos for the site with this.
[Winamp]: A fast, yet fully-featured, media player. It keeps me entertained.
[Firefox]: An excellent browser. "We've upped our standards, so up yours!"
[Thunderbird]: The companion to Firefox, it handles e-mail. No more Outlook!
[Rainlendar]: A great little calendar program that lives on your desktop.

lollipops, music that doesn't suck, things that are round, cars, the colour orange, people (individuals), semiconductors, little refrigerators, Eddie Izzard, sharp or pointy objects, domo-kun, humour, Alyson Hannigan, digital cameras, Sister Machine Gun, making stupid faces in the mirror or elsewhere, free software, crime movies, rubber bands, popsicles, words, omgwtfbbq, pants, the internet, meat, the colour blue, eating at restaurants, boobies, dimes.

seafood, people (as a whole), chocolate cake, most other kinds of cake, having goo/dirt/grime on my hands, soup, Bon Jovi, the smell of boiling cabbage, excessive drama, mullets, willful ignorance, waiting, cold weather, driving in snow, sequels, techno remixes of classical music, the fact that nuclear fusion has not been invented and shrunk down to the size of a AA battery to power my camera/game boy/cd player, nickels, sailors named Billy Budd, heavy-handed christian symbolism, when computers crash, bunny rabbits*.